Marriage is about love. The day we marry our best friend and make that vow to stay together ‘for better or for worse.’ We have to know getting into that sacred union that there will be a fine mix of both of those elements throughout the years of that journey together.
I always tell my clients that love is easy but relationships take work! Expect that from the beginning and be willing to dig in as deep as you need to along the way, when the going gets tough. One of the greatest gifts of a true partnership is having that safe place to go to when the world challenges us. It is OUR job to be that for our partner and their job to be that for us. Here are 5 ways to ensure that the happy times outweigh the bad.
1. Communication | Always take the time to ‘be’ with your partner and talk to them about the things that matter. Not just what is going on at work, home or with the kids…but tell them how you are feeling. Express your love to them so they always know where they stand and if issues arise, always be willing to address them head on, right away, before resentment builds.
2. Trust | Marriage is a sacred union. That word sacred means ‘devoted exclusively to one.’ Decisions we make will affect our partner and vice versa. We must think in terms of ‘we’ not ‘me’ and make decisions with this in mind. Once trust is broken it is really hard to get back, and puts an incredible strain on an intimate relationship. We must be honest with our partners and do whatever it takes to earn and keep their trust.
3. Respect is to understand that our partner is not us. They come with different ideas, beliefs, values and lessons and we may not always understand them, but it is our job to respect them. Love, without respect, will never contain enough glue to hold a relationship together long term. Love peaks and wanes…respect is constant. “Trust and respect are more important than love in a relationship because no love will last without equal amounts of respect and trust.” – Robin Kaye
4. Romance | Never forget about it. Romance is not just for the ladies. Men and women equally need love and affection and to be told and shown how much they are adored. Date your husband or wife. Don’t forget to do the things you did in the beginning to win their heart. Great relationships require conscious work…but if you stay attentive along the way, the work is fun.
5. Keep the digital stuff out of your relationship | Time together is such a rare thing these days so when you do have some time with your partner, put the phones, computers, tablets away. The most important person in the world is sitting next to you or across from you. Be present with them. Presence is a gift that keeps connections strong with one another.
Love is a partner-ship where TWO people come together and mutually agree on what their relationship stands for…and then it is the job of BOTH people to then stand in that. Always remember, love wasn’t designed to fix us or to be the space & place we work out our childhood wounds…it is given to us as a gift from God to enhance our life experience, because HE knows just how much the ‘right relationship’ can grow & strengthen us into who He made us to be.
Need more tips on how to keep your relationship in tip top shape, check out these simple & sweet ways to say “I love you.”
- 20 Quick And Sweet Ways To Show Your Love - January 27, 2017
- New Year’s Resolutions for the Single, Engaged and Married - December 23, 2016
- 5 Reasons to Renew Wedding Vows - May 17, 2016
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