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Ways To Escape Your Relationship Comfort Zone

• January 14, 2020
• by Natasha Burton

So much can happen in ten years time and now that we’re in a new decade, we’re all perfectly poised to map out how we want to live—and love—in 2020 and beyond. Use this time to get out of your relationship rut, abandon old habits, and renew your bond with each other by stepping up for your partner—and stepping out of your comfort zone. While there’s nothing wrong with being relaxed in your relationship, it’s easy to get too cozy and resign yourself to the status quo. Here’s how to get out of your relationship comfort zone and make this decade your best yet.

1. Do Something Different 
   Now’s the time to take a look at your respective bucket lists and start checking things off. A new decade can bring a fresh start to your relationship, and to your lives in general. Use 2020 as an excuse to finally book that romantic adventurous trip, take that pottery class together, adopt a pet or expand your family. Kick off the decade with a commitment to making the next ten years unforgettable.
2. Set Your Own #CoupleGoals 
   It’s easy to play the comparison game when scrolling through social media or reading celebrity news. Instead of focusing on what you think your relationship lacks when you see other people’s unions, center yourself on what you’re grateful for and what behaviors and actions you’d like to bring into your bond. Maybe you crave more date nights, more affection, more home-cooked dinners or more spontaneous flower deliveries—whatever it is, name it and share it with your partner. Being open and upfront about what you want in your relationship can stretch you out of your comfort zone but it will ultimately help you get what you need.
3. Talk About It
   All couples have something(s) to work on, whether it’s their communication, their work/life balance or their sex life. Instead of keeping mum on whatever you’d like to shift or change in your relationship, be bold and bring it up. Sure, being vulnerable can be tough, but reframing your so-called “issue” as an opportunity for growth will only bring you toward a happier, more satisfied chapter in your union.
4. Change It Up
   If your partner is always the one cooking dinner—or choosing the take-out order—try taking the lead on a task that’s typically theirs. Show your appreciation by breaking out the cookbook and whipping up a meal. (Even something as simple as grilled cheese totally counts!) Getting out of your routine not only gives your partner a break from whatever it is they usually take on, it also infuses some newness into your bond.
5. Keep Working On Yourself 
   Ultimately, spending time on you and working on your own personal growth is what will make the biggest difference in your relationship. Take stock of any worries you have, from body hang-ups to unfounded fears, and any behaviors that just aren’t serving you or your partner. Getting out of your comfort zone to shift into the person you truly want to be allows you to love yourself more fully—and love your partner more fully as a result.

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Natasha Burton

Relationship expert Natasha Burton is the author of four books: 101 Quizzes for Brides & Grooms, 101 Quizzes for Couples, 101 Quizzes for BFFs, and The Little Black Book of Big Red Flags. When she's not writing, she's likely doing yoga, baking, or watching The Bachelor.

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